Howdy! I’m writing to let you know about an exciting opportunity to annoy me, Music for Cougars! I’ve been working on an upcoming release. If you would like to have a cassette of said release I can send it to you in the mail. If you hate the music and everything it stands for, all the better reason to purchase. I’ll have to go to the post office myself and mail it myself and it’s gonna be a big hassle so you can be happy that I’ll be annoyed. If you would like a cassette because you are genuinely curious, that would be preferred, but I won’t judge.

“The only way the ancient astronaut theory can be disproven is when the extraterrestrials show up”

–Giorgio Tsoukalos

You heard the man! Let’s bring ’em on back. First, a little detour to Puma Punku.

Take a journey with me to a place called Puma Punku. It’s a pretty cool place already, but what if it were made by aliens?

According to local legends, the sky gods used a magical flute to move the great rocks of Puma Punku. Venture back in your mental time machine to a time where alien gods killed it so hard on the space flute that it moved mountains.

Interested parties should contact orionsbastard (at) gmail (dot) com or order using the link in the pic. Hear an excerpt here.

Update: You can stream the entire thing for free over at Bandcamp. I’ve since taken down this merch link but if you’re really jonesing for a cassette you can hit me up on Twitter and we can work something out.